Winning the lottery

I have surmised that sending applications is better than winning the lottery. I know this because in my life i have purchased 100 lottery tickets give or take (over the past 10 years) and i have sent over 100 applications and resumes out (over the past year and a half) .

here's how it works. I buy a lottery ticket. I pick the numbers it is my skills and confidence on paper. takes less than a week. I do this despite the odds. then naturally, I am just another dumb ass amongst millions that wasted a buck. my total now is -$1

fill out an online application, spend some time typing (41 wpm no errors, just above average) send it off, and that's it. I always feel like i might as well click the delete button because more often than not that's all you hear. maybe 1 in 20 will send you an email confirmation saying that the application was received, about 1 in 30 or 40 will send you the response:

"Thank you for your recent inquiry into the position _______ at ______. We appreciate your interest in working for _______.

We want to let you know that we are pursuing other candidates for this position at this time. This position will be closed out on our system shortly and all applicants who are not being further considered will receive this message.

Our website is updated regularly with new opportunities. We encourage you to check back often to see what has been added. "

seriously i have gotten this response from factories in other states, and places 10 miles down the road, word for word. further proof that the hr department is actually a giant computer that manipulates the world based on a data stream of 1's and 0's. probably controlled by aliens or Illuminati or something, although i haven't ruled out the robot takeover....

back on topic

so as of now I still have my dollar and the odds of being told I am not worth of some entry level job is about 1:30. the hollow non closure feeling occasionally makes me want to curl up in the fetal position in the shower, but it beats the big L stamped onto my forehead.

honestly though over the last few times i played the lottery i have gotten a $1 winner or $3 winner. rare but it happens.

the antipode to this would be the fact that occasionally I get an interview. Today was such a day. lopped off the chinstrap beard, shined the wing tips, shirt and tie. waited in the lobby for 30 minutes, then had what i though was a good interview for the next hour. I always think they go well. of those 100 or so resumes and apps sent out in the last year this would be my third interview.

in the end after all the non replies and failed interviews and flat out rejections I still feel a bit better about myself. Can't explain it. felt so good about the interview that I topped off the gas tank for $23.87 and bought a lottery ticket. can't feel good for too long.